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The Music News Lamestream Media Won't Report

When I first started the site Alex Hapted, then editor of iDesignSound, said discchord was the Fox News of music apps. He's a Brit, so I don't think he meant that to be as offensive as it is. But these are changing times. Between Buzzfeed's saccharin slant, and "Fake News" dominating Facebook feeds, the nature of reporting in the 21st century is rapidly changing. To stay relevant, discchord must also change.

By now we've all seen the Alt-Reich rise on the heady vapor of their hyperbolic alt-media. With pundits no longer bickering over spin, but now just lying outright and manufacturing hysteria. Alex Jones is the exemplar in this new media landscape. His rise began with conspiracies of George W. Bush, and later Obama, setting up "FEMA Death Camps" all over the country. He started to stoke the fires of nationalism by calling our last two presidents "Luciferian" and claimed that they were preparing to kill all of the Christians in America.

One would expect, and I certainly did, that someone making such insane claims would simply disappear. Who would continue to listen to him after all of his dire predictions and conspiracies have been blatant nonsense? If you know of any Christians in America, you can ask them personally what it was like in the FEMA Death Camps. They will, hopefully, respond with confusion because at no point in the last 16 years have any of our Presidents lead a genocide against Christian Americans.

Yet somehow this guy is more popular than ever! He has single-handily demonstrated that you can't go wrong screaming an endless stream of insane shit. In fact, you'll prosper!

I feel it is my duty to this community to foster growth and continue to spread our message of mobile music making. In order to achieve that I feel bound to emulate the Alt-Reich, and the new paradigm of our modern news. Instead of spreading their messages of nationalism and hate, I will continue to celebrate music making.

Music apps, however, seem like a bit of a dead-end.

A side-effect of Global Thermonuclear War is the large Electromagnetic Pulses (EMPs) that fry all circuitry for miles. I'm frankly amazed we've gone this long without Trump nuking Canada to get the "Snow Mexicans," but it is only a matter of time before he enters a full nuclear exchange with Russia to prevent Putin from releasing details of Trump's golden shower fetish. If by some miracle we avoid a shooting war, the impending Trade War with China will be financially crippling across the globe.

In these and countless other calamities we are left without electricity, iPads, or apps to play music. We've got to get inventive now and prepare for ways to make music in the holocaust that awaits.

Reader Comments 42

That's all very bleak! And I only watched Threads a couple of weeks ago...
March 31, 2017  | person_outline Jerry
Quit Facebook, quit twitter.
Much less junk that clutters up your life :)

Ignore the orange man, he is full of shit.
This will pass.
That's easy to say for me, I'm in another part of this planet. :)


March 31, 2017  | person lala
Damn dude, *I* was offended for you that someone would claim Discchord is the "Fox News" of anything. And it isn't like I have anything to do with the site, but rather seeing their unique brand of ass-hattery over the years.

"You've gone from crazy like a fox, to crazy like Fox News." Amy Wong, Futurama
Very inventive theme this year, Tim. Too bad it is so spot-on!

Well, I'm set for the EMP blast: have a trumpet, a recorder, and several bits of percussion. Now I'm just waiting for the alien landings that will follow the global trade wars.
I just wanna read about music apps, man. This is dumb.
March 31, 2017  | person_outline Derek
Me thinks that EMP got fired a bit too early... :-p
March 31, 2017  | person Joe Maron
As soon as the libtards take a few junior college classes in logics, then 'maybe' we can have open and honest debate, but till then I'm tired of debating them and their logical fallicies. Their fuel at best is a priori assumptions, or fed to them by the liberal lying MSM, and everytime I confront them in debate with facts their responses are always non sensical strawmen, red herrings, and circular reasoning, etc. I'm through with you Web and your liberal dung. I come to music related sites like this to get my mind off the liberal crap and lies of guys like you, and get my mind back on my God given gift of music. I'll get my synth news from Syntopia from now on. Good Riddance 👎🏼
March 31, 2017  | person_outline Rick Emerson
Well... I tried. I sincerely tried to keep politics out of this, only taking a single friendly swipe at Trump.

In all of this I just focused on the insane "news" sites that propped him up. I did a lot of research for this one. All of the headlines in the articles today are based on real articles found on these sites. In fact the first one, is a direct rip from Infowars.

http://discchord.com/appnews/2017/03/31/expert-chemtrails-could-wipe-out-humanity
https://www.infowars.com/expert-chemtrails-could-wipe-out-humanity/

My first impulse was to cry for humanity, but I'd rather try to laugh at all of this instead.
+1 for "Quit Facebook, quit twitter. Much less junk that clutters up your life :) "

@Rick Emerson - bye. Oh, fwiw: if you eliminated all the 'libtards' from music history then you'd be left with a pretty small selection of pure shit.

And for the record, the real issue is Neoliberalism and late capitalism. :-p
March 31, 2017  | person Nonny Moose
Agree real issue is Neoliberalism and late capitalism. Thought most of stuff on site was terrifying and funny.

Also great point about eliminating liberals from one's music life. Limiting my listening to Toby Keith, 3 Doors Down would be worse than no listening. Comparing the list of people performing at Obama's inauguration vs Trump's is astounding, though Obama is far more neoliberal than liberal, in spite of his being painted as left of Trotsky by the right-wing media. He took his health care plan from Mitt Romney and Bob Dole, not exactly liberal icons. His drones aren't exactly pacifist and more people were deported under his administration than in any other presidency. He was a pragmatist more than anything, but compared to tea partiers anything seems left.
March 31, 2017  | person MikeyB59
Well said Tim. By their use of words like "libtards" and "god given gift" of music in the same comment shall ye recognise the nasties, who would presumably have fiddled while Rome burned.
March 31, 2017  | person_outline Brian
Another great theme this year. Always love what you do with the site. I am also happy you are bringing light to these important issues. I cannot talk enough about the effect of chemtrails on my music making. I started off my career playing country versions of Wagner pieces. After a few vaccines and years of chemtrails I found myself playing luciferian electro free-jazz and doing a Disney-sponsored tour of the FEMA death camps. I blame the Annunaki.
March 31, 2017  | person DulceVida
Sooo.... ever heard of April 1st??? ;O :)
March 31, 2017  | person_outline Telengard
@Rick Emerson,

Yea, BYE!

Don't mean to be crass, but you referring to liberals as "lib-tards" is undeservedly insulting to liberals, and not very kind to developmentally disabled folks, either. Perhaps you like referring to the Democratic Party as the "Democ-RAT" party. That's clever.

Do you know what liberals call conservatives as an insult? I honestly have no idea.

You claim that you want "honest debate" and you even had a chance here, but you brought nothing to the table but ad hominem attacks. You ironically bemoan all the "logical fallicies" of liberals, you then impressively list strawmen, red herrings, circular reasoning etc, but it boggles the mind that you can't hear it when the right does it. I guess that implies confirmation bias, active information avoidance, and tribal epistemology.

You come here to get your mind off of the liberal crap? You think art and reality are separate? Good luck with your escape. Go and dwell on your comfortable thoughts. Climate change will find you just the same.

Good riddance to you, too.
March 31, 2017  | person stub
You know, it's not April 1 yet! This had me both delighted and baffled. And Rick Emerson's dead-on parody of a conservative wounded snowflake was hilarious. (That was a parody, right?)

well done.
March 31, 2017  | person_outline ExAsperis99
On March 31, 2017 - @DulceVida said:
Another great theme this year. Always love what you do with the site. I am also happy you are bringing light to these important issues. I cannot talk enough about the effect of chemtrails on my music making. I started off my career playing country versions of Wagner pieces. After a few vaccines and years of chemtrails I found myself playing luciferian electro free-jazz and doing a Disney-sponsored tour of the FEMA death camps. I blame the Annunaki.

LOL, the Annunaki were a great way to cap that. I'm surprised I didn't see more talk about Reptilians and Aliens on the conspiracy sites. I guess that stuff is just too crazy these day, but the idea that contrails are an evil government plot is "crazy enough it just might work!"

All of this talk has made me hungry for pizza. I wonder Alex can recommend a good pizza place? Preferably one without Luciferian child sex rings, but I'm not picky as long as they hold the anchovies.
Oh, yea, @ExAsperis99, I do hope that Rick Emerson's thing was a parody. If so, sorry, Rick. I missed it. I guess I need a big winky emoticon. My sarcasm detecter was damaged with the last big EMP. No seriously, it was.
March 31, 2017  | person stub
Great promoting acoustic and DYI instruments and music. No one gets a $ cut from that. Subversive for a digital music site.
March 31, 2017  | person Laarz
You've outdone yourself, Tim!

(and in some of the notes above... not sure if it's sarcasm, parody, or honest opinions. It's exactly like watching the evening news!)
I have no comment to Rick other then I feel very sad that education and science have taken a back seat to ignorance, prejudice and nationalism but of course Rick wouldn't understand these comments anyway.
April 01, 2017  | person That guy
Well written Tim I must say. I've been making music on Disckorg Gadget for a while until I discovered the app was adding subliminal pro government messages to all my songs. I've had to go through my entire library of creations and add white noise to any parts where subliminals are felt to be present.

I am now making a physical version of gadget free from corporate and government skullduggery; out of old trash I find around people's houses.
I'm pretty sure Rick Emerson won best April fool's joke on the site so far.
April 01, 2017  | person Roikat
On April 01, 2017 - @Roikat said:
I'm pretty sure Rick Emerson won best April fool's joke on the site so far.

I'm pretty sure he didn't.
... seemed like satire to me, but as SecretBaseDesign pointed out, you can't tell! I'm taking it as a joke, whether he meant so or not.
April 01, 2017  | person Roikat
Doh! ( I got duped! 😜)
April 01, 2017  | person Nonny Moose
Either reality has killed April's Fools, or we've been living in a constant April's Fools for the last 18 months
April 01, 2017  | person_outline Adrian
this was funny, one of my fav sites always :) , Make no apologies, nothing in life is devoid of politics, we are all in the content creation and art world or most of us one way or another, sitting quiet and censored of right w practicly criminal and every bit as sad as the shitstorm of conservatives and thier crusade against progress. .
April 01, 2017  | person_outline ian
On March 31, 2017 - @stub said:
@Rick Emerson,

Yea, BYE!

Don't mean to be crass, but you referring to liberals as "lib-tards" is undeservedly insulting to liberals, and not very kind to developmentally disabled folks, either. Perhaps you like referring to the Democratic Party as the "Democ-RAT" party. That's clever.

Do you know what liberals call conservatives as an insult? I honestly have no idea.

You claim that you want "honest debate" and you even had a chance here, but you brought nothing to the table but ad hominem attacks. You ironically bemoan all the "logical fallicies" of liberals, you then impressively list strawmen, red herrings, circular reasoning etc, but it boggles the mind that you can't hear it when the right does it. I guess that implies confirmation bias, active information avoidance, and tribal epistemology.

You come here to get your mind off of the liberal crap? You think art and reality are separate? Good luck with your escape. Go and dwell on your comfortable thoughts. Climate change will find you just the same.

Good riddance to you, too.

What a great response. Every comment page should have "like" and "dislike" voting buttons. Every single one.
April 02, 2017  | person dysamoria



HOW ABOUT A NICE GAME OF CHESS?
April 02, 2017  | person_outline Blaaaarghonaut
On April 02, 2017 - @dysamoria said:
What a great response. Every comment page should have "like" and "dislike" voting buttons. Every single one.

I thought pretty hard about including that in the original design. I even came up with a fun animated +1 thing since lots of people reply here with "+1" to comments. But I decided against it. In looking at how other forums use them, I feel the "like/dislike" button is one convenience too far.

I'd rather have people say things like, "What a great response."

Instead of a nearly effortless, and thus nearly meaningless, button.

I want to apologize for my band mate, Rick. He means well, but he is just, shall we say, parody deficient. At least that is my interpretation of it. He is actually quite educated, holding an advanced degree in logics. However watching too many MSM reports might have him a bit bewildered and confused. You see at this point I can't tell if he knows fake news from real news, at least not as well as the rest of the band. And his various jokes on the matter just leave us with embarrassed half smiles, as we can't tell if it is a joke. So we play it off so as not to upset him too much. Because, well, we do need him in the band and he is always threatening to leave. So just give him some slack if you will. And I will do my best to steer him away from potentially dangerous information sites such as this one.
April 02, 2017  | person_outline Keith Wakeman
Hahaha!! Great one Tim!! My Little Ponies, etc., etc.!! Every April 1st, it's a joy to come and see what you are going to post!!! :-)
April 02, 2017  | person_outline audiojunkie
So glad to have "Keith Wakeman" intercede for "Rick Emerson"...I'm sure one (or the other) of them DOES need to be in the band -- have a real noice April 1st!!!
April 02, 2017  | person Trilobyte
@Keith Wakemen --- I see what you did there! Hee-larious.
April 02, 2017  | person stub
On April 02, 2017 - @Tim Webb said:

I thought pretty hard about including that in the original design. I even came up with a fun animated +1 thing since lots of people reply here with "+1" to comments. But I decided against it. In looking at how other forums use them, I feel the "like/dislike" button is one convenience too far.

I'd rather have people say things like, "What a great response."

Instead of a nearly effortless, and thus nearly meaningless, button.


+1! ;)

Bravo for encouraging more expressive interaction. And, enjoyed all the doomsday posts. :)


April 02, 2017  | person skiphunt
Hilarious!
April 02, 2017  | person ngarjuna
Alex Jones runs a cottage industry based on fear.
Until a few years ago, one could extract some proven factoids from his ravings and ramblings.
This was before he descended into outright (or alt-right) lunacy and shifted the focus to selling his own brands of quackery, reducing the broadcast to little more than a sales pitch targeting preppers, bible belters and other such types.
Now he has morphed into Trump's very own Julius Streicher.
April 02, 2017  | person_outline Karl
Actually, it's the "dislike" button I'm most in need of these days on the Internet. It's fine to remark how someone's post was interesting, well said, or critique otherwise rational comments, but I really need a shortcut for the process of rebutting and trying to drown out nutty and blatantly horrible human [Internet] voices without putting so much time into constructing rebuttals against people who aren't likely to exercise critical thinking in the first place, let alone in reading rebuttals. I would hope that when someone finds their crap getting voted into oblivion by the community, they'll move on. Have you ever met a web troll who said "Thanks to your well-reasoned response, I realize my attitude/behavior/ideology was all wrong and I'm hereby changing my ways"...?
April 03, 2017  | person dysamoria
This is really funny, both Tim's annual joke and the reactions afterwards.
I'm A Latino, (as US'ers like to say with a funny accent, but a Latino from Europe. ( I'm used to think that what you call latinos in America are Americans with Latin culture, but Americans not latinos). I just got dizzy saying Latino so many times.
Well I don't understand half of the articles you're talking about but it's clear to me that your shit smells as bad as our European shit. Here we have the fucking NaZis walking again amongst us in plain daylight with big smiles on their faces and proud again (from the Pirineus up) while in the south we spend all of our money on cocain and whores, sorry I meant wine and women. It's like a freaking giant Roman (Latin) orgy. An it's sunny all the time with the whole Atlantic bathing our feet.
This is the Real Southern Confort.
April 03, 2017  | person_outline Southern Comfort
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